A Little Pink Eraser

Sometime last year I stood before the church to recognize our acolytes for their service. I had dropped the ball in providing adequate notice of the event and waited too long in ordering appreciation tokens so needless to say, it wasn't very impressive. I took responsibility and apologized for my shortcomings and mistakes. My busy schedule had gotten the best of me. I felt awful and embarrassed.
Shortly after I sat down, still kicking myself for letting the congregation and acolytes down, a very good friend was called up to do the children's moments. She began talking to the little ones about making mistakes and how God loves us even when we mess up. She gave them each a little pink eraser to remind them how God erases our mistakes and sins when we ask for forgiveness. As she walked back to her seat, she stopped by my pew, handed me an eraser, and told me that my mistakes can be erased, too.
That eraser travels with me every day as a reminder that God loves me always, even during those times I mess up. I turn to Him, and He erases my sins! I don't have to be perfect, because He is.

I am not a hater

I would be remiss if I didn’t say something in regards to the Chick-Fil-A Appreciation Day that occurred August 1, 2012 under the prompting of Gov. Mike Huckabee. While I do not generally get into religious or political debates (and do not plan to engage in one now), I feel a need to explain my thoughts on why I bought lunch there.
I am really bothered when someone expresses his/her faith in God and choice to live according to His Word, and is then labeled as judgmental or intolerant. Being politically incorrect doesn’t make one judgmental or intolerant or even unloving. Being pro-something doesn’t automatically make one a hater.
According to my understanding of God’s Word, and my Christian belief, we are to love God with all our heart, soul, and mind. We are to love our neighbor as ourselves. In my interpretation of those two commandments, and later on where we are told not to judge others, I see no part that doesn’t say we can gather with other Christians and celebrate our freedoms of speech and religion. Yesterday’s gathering wasn’t a hate-fest.
Also, as part of my Christian faith, I support that marriage is a sacred union between a man and a woman.   The Bible is very clear throughout regarding sexual relationships and that they should be within the confines of marriage and also between man and woman. The Cathy Family believes this to be true. In saying it publicly, Chick-Fil-A is deemed anti-gay. I am now saying it publicly, and run the risk of being anti-gay, although I love everyone. Here’s where the “thou shalt not judge” comes in. Just because I do not agree with someone does not mean I hate them. I have gay friends. I have had gay relatives. I love them all truly. Just because I do not embrace or endorse the lifestyle doesn’t mean I love them any less.
We ALL sin. We must all get the log out of our own eye before we can see to get the speck out of our neighbor’s eye. We cannot judge each other, but I ask that my stance be respected even if you disagree just as I respect yours.  
I have fallen short of the glory of God many times. I continue to try harder, do better, understand more, and draw closer to Him. As the little children’s song said “Red and yellow, black and white, they are precious in His sight, Jesus loves the little children of the world.” We are the children of the world- red, yellow, black, white, gay, straight, married, single, young, old, tall, short….Jesus loves us all and commands that we love us all, too.

I love you all!

My Wish For You

My babies 2003

Ever hear a song many times and interpret one way, then all of a sudden hear it one day and get a totally different idea from it? Well, that happened to me today. I have heard "My Wish" by Rascal Flatts for 5 or 6 years now and always thought it was a nice song about two people in love with one going off to pursue a dream. Today, as the song came on the radio, I thought of my children.
As the song played and got to the chorus, tears formed in my eyes. I began to realize in a few short years, my children would be venturing out on their own. 

But more than anything, more than anything,
My wish, for you, is that this life becomes all that you want it to,
Your dreams stay big, and your worries stay small,
You never need to carry more than you can hold,
And while you're out there getting where you're getting to,
I hope you know somebody loves you, and wants the same things too,
Yeah, this, is my wish.

Our family August 2011

The rest of the lyrics touched me just as much. I drove to town this morning fighting back the tears at the thought I will have two in high school with the last one close behind in 8th grade this school year. When I think of how quickly the years have passed, I get emotional. I love their growing independence, but still get nervous when they are not all with me. I feel best when I have them all at home. I have never thought of myself as an overly sheltering mother since I don't shield them from all of life's unsavory aspects. Nonetheless, I feel most secure when I know exactly where each are and who they're with. This song reminds me that the time will come when I have to let go. I pray that when the time comes, they will hold tight to all they have been taught. Proverbs 22:6 says, "Train a child in the way he should go, and when he is old he will not turn from it." We have done our best to train our child in the ways of The Lord, and we hold tight to this promise. The day is nearing when I will have to say to them, "This is my wish, I hope you know somebody loves you."



Dreading Mother's Day...

Yesterday, well, actually Saturday, I began the annual dread of Mother's Day. Not because I don't love my mother, or don't love being a mother, but as attention is given to it, I can't help but analyze all of my shortcomings as a mother. We are often reminded of Proverbs 31 on Mother's Day in sermons and the Virtuous Wife sounds amazing. I definitely fall short and will never live up to that biblical example. Depression begins to set in.

I do the best I can yet I know if I were to rise a little earlier, or stay up a little later, or push myself a little harder, I could have a cleaner and more organized house and no pile of laundry in the closets....wait, that's it! I beat myself up every year because I don't have an immaculate home and no dirty laundry?!?

When I think of the love I show my family, none could outlove me. When I think of how I sacrifice my time and desires for them, none could replace me. I love my children more than anyone could. As they grow and mature, I pray they remember my love, not my piles of laundry. I hope they can be proud of what I do for them, and not worry about what is left undone at times. Things often get left undone to watch a show together, or play on the water. Those are the times I pray will be remembered.

I don't hold their hand through everything. I don't pack their lunches. I don't pick out their clothes. (I do veto outfits at times.) I don't micromanage them at all. My goal is to raise them to be self-sufficient. I see them each day moving toward adulthood. It makes me proud. My heart is heavy in knowing that they are growing so fast, but full of joy that they will be responsible adults in a matter of years. As I reflect on the years passing so quickly, I want to make the most of the time we have together as a family. If things are left undone, then so be it. They will learn to adapt and roll with the changes.

I have always loved this song by Toby Keith. We all have a list of things we need to get done. Often, those things become how we measure ourselves. When I fall behind, or fail to do something, I begin to analyze my shortcomings. I have told my husband on countless occasions that he deserves so much better than me. However, when I really think about it, no one could love him more...just may keep his house cleaner and the laundry done.

I have come to the conclusion that I really need to stop saying that to him. He deserves the most love any woman can give, and I KNOW I can give him that. My children deserve a mother who will give them the most love she can give, and I KNOW I can give them that. I cannot and will not promise a showcase home, but I can promise love, care, and attention ALWAYS.

Maybe I don't fall short after all...

Pollyanna

Sometimes life is just plain hard. No way around it.
We get hit with things out of our control. We see our friends suffer and there is nothing we can do about it. Then, there's just a bad cold that seems to make everything else seem worse, too.

I am in one of those sort of funks right now. My friends are hurting and there is nothing I can do to help. And I just can't seem to shake this bad cold or whatever it is. However, my ailments pale in comparison to what others around me are experiencing. I shouldn't complain. Yet I do. :(

We have a movie on our DVR called Pollyanna. Some may have heard of this movie, or even just the term "being a Pollyanna." I had heard the term long before seeing the movie. Dictionary.com defines the term as "an excessively or blindly optimistic person." When you read that, you almost get the idea it is a bad thing. After watching the movie, Hayley Mills (aka Miss Bliss from Saved by the Bell) portrays the character Pollyanna who in most circumstances likes to play the Glad Game. She purposedly focuses on the good in situations and doesn't allow the bad to bring her down. She is not blindly optimistic, but intently optimistic. For example, instead of me complaining about this awful cold, I can be glad I do not have the flu. I can still function to some degree.




We could all take a lesson from Pollyanna. When we decide, or allow ourselves to hone in on the evils and troubles of this world all the time, we miss the blessings before us. I am not saying to look at the world through rose-colored glasses, but to take time to notice the blessings. They will always far outweigh the troubles if you look hard enough.God loves each and every one of us. He promises to be with us each step of the way. He sends His Holy Spirit to comfort and guide us. We are never alone. Be glad in that!

 

Psalm 118:24

This is the day the Lord has made; let us rejoice and be glad in it.