Life is Full of Stages...Which One Are You In?

Life is full of stages. Everyone is at a different stage in life. Some in the beginnings while others are in the end. Some are somewhere in the middle like me. Today, I reflect on several of those stages.

This morning as I was leaving church, I look down at my phone and see a calendar reminder that it is the birthday of my beloved boss, Roy, who passed away last fall. It sort of took my breath for a moment and broke my heart a little more. He reached the end stage of life much sooner and quicker than anyone who knew him would believe.

This afternoon, as the five members of our family head to town in one car (a rare occasion these days), we decide to let our youngest, Jessica, have a driving lesson. She passed her permit test last fall and has driven less than a handful of times mainly due to hardly ever riding with her parents. This is our third and final child to learn to drive. As she enters a new stage of life to learn this new skill, her parents enter a new stage also. Within a short time, with little moments already, we will be empty-nesters. Our children will soon be adults out in the big world.

After this nervous drive to town, James and I attended a visitation for a well-respected, much loved woman. She was 94. Her daughter said, “She sat down in her favorite chair, read the newspaper and went to sleep. That’s a wonderful death, and I know now she’s with dad. That gives me peace.” She had had a long, fulfilling life. While her family and friends say goodbye to her, those same family and friends welcome her 25^th great-grandchild into the world. Here is another reminder to the circle of life, and its stages.

Then, we went to our church’s family Easter egg hunt and family dinner. While I am well beyond the stage of having children who hunt eggs, it is such a joy to share the event with those who have little ones having such fun. I must admit I giggle a bit listening to young parents coax their children to eat more real food rather than cookies, or even eat at all rather than play. Watching them chase the littles to keep them off the food table or trash can reminds me of how quickly those stages pass away. I remarked that I was now closer to grandchildren than babies of my own. Why does it seem like it was just yesterday that I was in that stage?

Life is definitely full of stages. Some come faster than others. We can dread them and worry incessantly about them, or we can choose to embrace them. We can praise God through the storms and rejoice in the sun (Son). If we believe that Christ is with us through everything, we can face tomorrow with hope and joy. I dare not say we won’t have nail-biting times (remember we are teaching the third child to drive) or we won’t have to say goodbye to someone special. I do say that life will continue to go on and we will have more stages to experience. Bring it on!!

To Feed or Be Fed? That Is the Question.

To feed or be fed? That is the question.

I haven't thought about that in quite some time, but there was a time in my life that I had to think about it. A number of years ago, actually over 15 years, I was extremely active in my church, doing this and that, sort of all over the place. Committees, bible studies, teaching, and yet I became disgruntled. I needed "to be fed" spiritually. I began to complain about my church and contemplated changing where I worshiped. Pretty soon, nothing at church seemed to satisfy me. There came a time I finally voiced all of my feelings to my husband James...my ever wise and level-headed husband. His response has stayed with me since that moment. He said, "Maybe this is not a time for you to be fed at church, but a time for you to feed. You can get fed in other ways and places."

What?!? Not a time for me to be fed? Isn't that why I go to church? Soon I realized what he meant. When I refocused my energy and efforts at church to serve others in a more intentional way rather than focusing on what I needed, I was blessed beyond comprehension. And guess what? I got "fed".
Christ came to serve and to attend to the needs of others. He didn't focus on himself and what he needed. He fulfilled His purpose by serving others.

When we put our own wants and needs aside, and focus on those of others, we are blessed. We are fulfilled. We are fed spiritually.

This perspective brought to me by my husband has had a tremendous impact on my life. It has prompted me to carefully choose when and where I serve so that I may be doing so according to the will of God, not what I want or need. If I serve to please God, not to somehow make myself feel good or be fed, then it becomes a fruitful endeavor resulting in me being blessed anyhow.

Rick Warren in his book A Purpose-Driven Life opens with the line "it's not about you." It is about Jesus Christ. It is about having a relationship with Our Father. It is about loving your neighbor as yourself. Those words, along with James' profound insight, has shaped my life and my attitude toward church. When we change our focus from ourselves, we are blessed. Blessed beyond understanding.

Matthew 7:21-23New American Standard Bible (NASB)
21 “Not everyone who says to Me, ‘Lord, Lord,’ will enter the kingdom of heaven, but he who does the will of My Father who is in heaven will enter.22 Many will say to Me on that day, ‘Lord, Lord, did we not prophesy in Your name, and in Your name cast out demons, and in Your name perform many[a]miracles?’ 23 And then I will declare to them, ‘I never knew you;